So, I just realized that I have the absolute coolest manager on the face of this green earth.

Today, a friend of mind had a table, who pretty much just scrubbed her. They were being obnoxious, rude, belligerent, the whole nine yards. I think it started with a Baked Potato that they ordered, and my friend Kim told them "I'm sorry, we don't have any, would you like something else?" Then they threw a hissy fit about god knows what... maybe they really like potatos... who knows... so Kim goes to the back, waits to heat up her table's potato, takes exquisite care of it, and then hands it to the lady, who proceeds to literally shove the potato, and THROW THE FREAKING PLATE AT HER.

Now, that's when everything just.... stopped. All service... all commotion... all everything just crept to a silence. I swear time stopped, and everyone just pretty much went "HOE-LEE-FUCK" So Kim storms off in TEARS, because this table careened a plate of food at her, in front of all her other tables, and that's when I comforted her for a moment or two. When I come back, the lady is LIVID, she's literally wondering: "Why is the server crying?" Thinking that we got so pissed at Kim that we tore into her. It simply couldn't have been the big piece of porcelian clanging on the floor, missing her by inches... of course. So the manager comes out, and she begins to lay into him, telling him something along the lines of owning a business, and if her head cook EVER made a Server cry, that the cook would be fired on the spot, this and that, left and right, while the manager's like "you're f*&$%ng bonkers!" (Let me be clear, this was not the General Manager in charge of the store, he was just a normal manager, who happened to be scheduled that day) So then, she asks for Pat. Which pretty much signals that the gloves are DROPPED.

Now, let me talk about Pat for a minute. Pat is an asshole... he has to be. He's snide, sarcastic, hard to please, always demanding, and never does he stray from the right...so to speak. He's not an easy man to work for, because everything has to be HIS way, HIS time, HIS liking. If you fuck up, he'll let you KNOW you fucked up, unless you're man enough to admit (hey! I fucked up... I'm a retard). But let me tell you, in situations like this... he's not afraid to flex... and he will back you tooth and nail. So he comes up, all nice and proper, like a normal manager should... of course. And she lays IN to him. Saying all this shit about getting people fired for making the poor girl cry (because, again, turning a plate into a projectile aimed at the poor woman is CLEARLY good restaurant etiquette), and she says that she owns a restaurant in Split Rock.

To which his reply: "You mean people still GO THERE?!?"

This made just about everyone do another dead-stop. Now me, who usually just gets the biggest kick out of that, just stopped in my tracks. Even I thought that was just VICIOUS. (A few hours later it hit me hard, and I was almost in tears laughing). The lady just stood there in shock, and then started mumbling something about closing this store and firing people, to which Pat said again (in plain view of everyone)

"No, no one is getting fired. You're the stupid bitch who threw the plate and endangered my server, YOU made her cry... so you can just fuck off and never come back, thanks :}" And walked away.

The ENTIRE STAFF cheered like madmen. We just lost all etiquette and were hooting and hollering like crazy. To which he comes to us, nods his head, says "anything like that happens to any of you, I'll tell them the exact same thing... now GET TO WORK!" and we were off like a shot.

I told you he was awesome.